Treatment for Wolves

Here's another one of those wacky Screenland pictorials (No. 27, December 1961). This time around our favorite fatty Peng Peng gets cured of his lasciviousness by "Doctor" Cheung Ying-choi and Siu Keun, a popular Amoy actress from the 1950s who some 16 months later would become one of the hottest stars on the Mandarin screen. That's right, folks: this young lady is none other than Ms. Ivy Ling Po!

A scan of the original is available here.


Pang Pang, despite his unusual bulk, was as fond of women as he was fond of eating. One day, he went to a friend's house and saw a nurse at the house opposite. He called to her as if he knew her.


The pretty nurse, Siu-kuen, did not know Pang Pang. But he insisted that he knew her. Siu-kuen had to admit it. She even invited Pang Pang into her house. He of course jumped at the offer and went.


Siu-kuen told him that this was the bungalow of her doctor whom she had followed here to take a rest. She said that she would introduce the doctor to him. Pang Pang said that was fine. After a moment, Cheung Ying-choi came out, claiming that he was the doctor.


Pang Pang wanted to get rid of the doctor, so that he could be with Siu-kuen alone. He complained of a stomach ache, and the doctor brought instruments.


It was the biggest hypodermic needle in the world, and also a thermometer which was one foot long, which he forced into Pang Pang's mouth. Pang Pang was quite scared of these huge things, but since the girl was there, he didn't mind much.


After taking his temperature, Cheung said it was necessary for an injection. Pang Pang was taken aback. "But your needle is so big!" he stammered. Cheung Ying-choi smiled, "But so is your own body."


As he said so, he motioned Pang Pang to remove his pants. When his fat buttock was exposed, Cheung held the needle like he was holding a rifle. He aimed carefully and pushed it down into Pang Pang's flesh.


Almost two feet of the needle went in and Pang Pang bellowed like a pig being tortured. "Don't move," Cheung warned seriously. "Otherwise the needle may break and will require an operation to get out."


Pang Pang gritted his teeth and appealed, "Please take it easy." "I have tried my best," Cheung declared. "Now don't move, I'm going to inject the medicine." "How many c.c.?" "It is not how many c.c. It's two pounds!"


After Cheung finished injecting the two pounds of medicine, Pang Pang cried in despair, "I'm going to die!" Cheung took a look and was secretly shocked. For the medicine had made Pang Pang's belly swell real big!


Pang Pang could not move a foot. He held on to his belly and moaned, "I sure am going to die this time!" Cheung called Siu-kuen out and winked at her. "We have succeeded," he told her proudly.


Seeing Pang Pang, Siu-kuen could not help wanting to laugh. She told Cheung, "This is exactly the kind of treatment for wolves!" "He should have had enough this time," Cheung replied.