Amy Childs star of the “reality show” The Only Way Is Essex

There’s nothing subtle about Amy Childs. She is the opposite of subtlety. Let’s peruse this picture of her heading to the pool whilst on holiday in Spain a couple of weeks ago. It must have taken Amy Child AGES to get ready. Hours. Buckets of fake tan, a full face of makeup, making sure the manicure was perfect, blowdrying the hair, the jewellery, the heels. Of course the vajazzle was perfect not a doubt about that.

Amy, I’m exhausted just thinking about it.

Amy was the undisputed star of the “reality show” The Only Way Is Essex (TOWIE) which splashed onto screens in an orgy of waxing, tanning, fake hair and all round high maintenance. Of course it was scripted to bits, but the depiction of orange Essex girls was pretty spot on. And 22 year old Amy Child with her fake boobs became the undisputed queen of the Vajazzle – the Brazilian wax complete with sequins and crystals.

If there’s no bling she’s not interested. If there’s no spray tan salon nearby she’s not going.

But I love Amy. I love her unashamed embracing of everything bling, tacky and uber maintenance.

Jordan and Jodie Marsh hang up your plastic crowns. There’s a new orange princess on the block.

“Losing your curves can boost your career,” believes former TOWIE’s actress Amy Childs.

While fans are already reeling over Amy’s exit from The Only Way Is Essex, the brunette hottie has hit the top trends with one more shocking keyword – the 5ft 5in star’s disappearing curves!

The 21 year old redhead, who has tipped to appear on Celebrity Big Brother, showed off her petite body last week while out in Mayfair and pals tell us she’s lost over 10lb.

“She has gone from a size 10 to a size 6-8,” said a close pal.